• The right stuff still scores at Beatrice [NYM]
• Some quality ice is in our cocktails [Gothamist]
• Matt Levine breaks his [hour] long silence [Eater]
• Ds gives Aa an F [DivisionStreet]
  

Our crack team of scientists has indeed cracked the first code of El Bano. So what is behind door #1? A key! We knew it! And the key comes with another clue, saying:

El Bano is a secret club, and like all things secret it's only known by few.

To gain access to the club you must first possess a key. You see, first you go into a lovely little bodega and enter the bathroom with your key. You will see a bouncer in the bathroom guarding a stall. You give him the nod and he'll open the door and a wall will slide open revealing the club. Getting a key is easy. If you're our friend you already have one. If you're famous or strikingly beautiful, you already have one. We make mistakes though, and may want to offer you a key.

The plot thickens! Tomorrow, we will bring you a special interview with the secretive El Bano management, who will unveil some more details about their super secret hideaway lounge.

Being the diligent journalists that we are, we decided to email the reservations line at El Bano to try and get the low down on this secret bastion of exclusivity. The result? El Bano is even more exclusive than we could ever imagine! We got an immediate response back, saying:

Thanks for your reservation inquiry.

Due to the exclusivity of our club, it's impossible for us to accommodate all requests.  If you feel you really belong, please E-Mail us back and let us know why.

Well, how could we ever come up with a reason as to why we belong in the Toilet? We couldn't. But our scientists are still working on answering their brain teaser, and we will have a location shortly.

Can there possibly be a more exclusive club than the most exclusive of them all? Apparently, there can be. Brace yourselves for El Bano, a place so exclusive that it calls itself "New Yorks Most Exclusive Nightlife Experience." Fascinating stuff. According to their dizzying website, El Bano comes complete with a Famous Mixologist and a Famous Chef, none of which you are allowed to know about. As per the location, you aren't allowed to know that either, with El Bano saying "that if you’re supposed to know where we are, you know where we are." Douchey. But if you can solve their puzzle, you will find out where they are located. We have hired a crack team of scientists to work on this riddle immediately, and will provide an update soon. And just in case you cared, The Toilet will be open in time for Fashion Week.

Just 8 weeks after being closed for re-tooling, the former Cafe Socialista space at 505 West Street is ready to re-introduce itself to NYC. Stans, a new Thursday night event, is poised to take over the former Cuban cafe beneath the Jane Hotel, and the organizers believe they have a one of a kind location. How do we know? It's on the invitation, saying "It is revered by experts in their field as a classic party location that just now has resurfaced." They promise $6 beers, dancing, and potential kissing - not too shabby. Most importantly, it seems to make the situation at the Jane Hotel a bit more interesting, considering the still going Socialista lounge and Eric Goode and Sean MacPherson's two planned spaces in their sailor friendly hotel.

• Cougars to the rescue of our bankers (subsequently, our nightlife) [Dealbreaker]
• Something high and hip planned for barren Flatiron [NYM]
• Our two faves are besties [GNML]
• Elected officials in need of throw down lessons [Radar]
  

The record player having, soon-to-open, super cool Ace Hotel seems to have everything put together. With a hip brand opening its first NYC locations, Rudy's barber shop, gourmet coffee, Ken Friedman backed restaurants, and guitars in the rooms, how could it possibly fail?  Well, they still have to get rid of the SRO tenants, and it looks like things are getting a bit desperate. A Little Birdy reports that "there are some tenants that have simply refused to take a buy out, and the people from the Ace have repeatedly raised the offer. It started out at $5,000 and has doubled several times. I have heard the remaining tenants are being offered around $100K just to get out!" Do you hear that people? We suggest finding yourselves a room in one of the few Manhattan SRO's left and hunkering down until some fancy hotel developer "discovers" an  opportunity.

We know it's just a website, but it's just a wee bit ironic that the Eldridge has already made it onto the World's Best Bars without even being open yet. We mean, come on. The website even notes that almost none of you will ever get in (or want to), saying "It’s, unsurprisingly, a reservations only joint and, even then, chances are you’ll have to know somebody who knows somebody (who knows Levine) to even stand a chance of gaining entry." Something very strange about being so great that no one can go, but that's just us.

We have to hand it to our friends at A Continuous Lean - they always come prepared. So when ACL made their way to Vegas for some R&R before the Project Trade Show, they decided to ship out a case of Barritts Ginger Beer to enjoy some refreshing Dark and Stormy's. ACL - always styling.

• Blondes have more fun at the Hudson Hotel [Gawker]
• Last party at the pool [Gothamist]
• Preview of Apotheke [NYM]
• Kurve lives [Eater]
  

Matt Levine, owner of the amazing Eldridge,  is going to be one busy beaver during Fashion Week. He tells Radar that he "came off sounding like a jackass" a few weeks back, that jackassedness resulted in a business boom. Good for you Steelo. But just how is all of this business going to result in any profit? Lucky for us, a Little Birdy who also was interested in the Luv space sent us the specs on the building, and we would love to share them with you.

The big question is - are you ready for 14 years of the Eldridge? You may not have a choice.

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Joshua David Stein, New York's busiest and most influential reporter, delivered a tour de force article in Page Six Magazine this week on the former queen of New York City nightlife, Amy Sacco. You may recognize some familiar names. Ahem. Ahem. Best part is Amy's comment that she has gone "into hedge funds and finance." So have we. And we also enjoyed the comments about London's Bungalow 8, with one Londoner commenting “I would rate the club lounge at Heathrow Airport higher than this place.” Ouchy.